Yesterday one of my sorority sisters, who is finishing her freshman year, asked me a question.
She asked me what was the most important thing I learned during my freshman year. That’s not what I was expecting her to ask due to the fact that the preceding conversation was about boyfriends and crushes.
So I stopped and thought about it for a second.
At first I thought it would be about boys, but then I realized what it was.
The Most Important Thing I learned my freshman year was to keep up friendships. That includes friends from high school and friends I made that year.
I told her that it’s not easy and sadly you do lose some along the way. People who were a huge part of your life one semester turn into a number in your contacts that you scroll past and don’t think twice about. And that’s okay.
I told her that you can’t agonize over the people who aren’t in your life anymore. You’ll go crazy if you try. People come in and out of your life, especially in college, for a reason. The ones who stay in it, however, those people are golden.
And keeping up friendships means being that friend who is always texting, or calling, or trying to make plans. Plans that nine times out of ten usually fall through. And when they do you think you’re that annoying friend who texts or calls them constantly. But you’re not. (Believe me they will tell you if you are) Life just gets in the way more often than not.
I believe that reaching out every so often reminds people that you’re there for them. Sometimes they might forget it and we ourselves forget it until that one friend of ours sends us a message saying, “I miss you, when are you free?”
Then there are the times when that one time out of ten plans come together. And it’s great. Usually because you spend hours catching up, laughing at good times (or crying because of current ones), and promise to try to be better about seeing each other (especially before one or both of you graduate).
And sometimes, you reach out, life continues to get in the way, and that person truly does fall out of your life. That happens. Everyone goes through it. Some times certain people leaving sucks more than others whereas other times you don’t even realize it.
But I think that’s all a part of life, not just college.
I don’t have the same friends I had four years ago. I don’t have the same friends I had one year ago. But that doesn’t mean that every single person I’ve met along the way hasn’t made an impact on my life.
Now, of course, there are those that become a constant in your life. Those are the greatest. Hold on to them tightly. Make the most of the time you have with them especially when you’re in the same geographic area (i.e. college). And when life and miles put distance between you, be even more annoying and call and text them multiple times a day.
You’ll be glad you did.